"I wish you a good death" hardly sounds like a cheerful way to send a child off to school in the morning or to say so long to a friend.
But the everyday Irish saying, far from an urgent desire for a loved one's demise, alludes to a logical sequence, according to Richard Groves: "If you had a happy death, you had a happy life."
Care for the dying should extend beyond alleviating physical pain and suffering to address the needs of the soul -- the emotional, spiritual and cultural needs of a person, said Groves, co-founder of the Sacred Art of Living Center, a nonprofit educational institute in Bend, Ore.
He brought his emphasis on treating "the total person" to Seattle on Thursday for a seminar sponsored by Swedish Medical Center and Multifaith Works.
The annual seminar started in 1991 to help the medical, hospice and pastoral communities understand the ramifications of Initiative 119. The measure, rejected by voters, would have allowed doctors to prescribe lethal prescriptions to terminally ill patients.
But Initiative 1000, which is similar to the I-119 except that doctors would not be allowed to administer the deadly drugs, passed easily in Tuesday's election. That made this year's seminar, though not focused on I-1000, still particularly relevant.
When caring for someone in deep pain and suffering, "lean into the pain," Groves told an audience of about 150 people at Swedish. "Don't ignore it. Don't snow it" with drugs.
By giving only physiological treatment and bypassing such matters as meaning in life, hope, forgiveness and the frantic pace of living, he said, "you're not serving the person well."
Grove traced the hospice movement back 1,000 years to medieval France and quoted a variety of thinkers on pain and suffering, particularly the ancient Celts, who gained strength through adversity.
His wife, Mary, was diagnosed with kidney cancer and given two years at most to live. She radically changed her diet, exercise routine and mental outlook, vowing to learn "how to live with cancer and not just die with cancer," he said.
Ten years later, Mary is still here. Her oncologist recently told her that an 18-month experimental drug has played a role but added, "I can't tell you why it's working," said Groves, co-author with Henriette Anne Klauser of Edmonds of "The American Book of Dying."
Groves, who holds four master's degrees, was an ordained Roman Catholic priest and served as a prison and military chaplain.
Before voters passed Oregon's Death With Dignity Act in 1997, he helped create focus groups to discuss the issue, concerned that citizens did not fully understand the end-of-life needs of patients.
If the medical, hospice and pastoral communities adequately addressed patient needs beyond the medical, would laws like I-1000 be necessary?
"I think the need would evaporate," Groves said.
What Groves teaches about treating the whole person is echoed in medical schools and journals, said Delmas Luedke, director of spiritual care at Swedish.
From a chaplain's perspective, Luedke said, I-1000 will not make much of a difference because the same patient questions -- such as "why am I here?" -- still need to be sorted through.
"The more we come to a resolution," he said, the less likely a patient would need to exercise the provisions of I-1000.
Another seminar attendee, the Rev. Bob Lewis of Nativity Lutheran Church in Renton, hopes the passage of I-1000 will increase dialogue about end-of-life issues, including the value of life in a vegetative state.
"Life at all costs is not life to me," he said.
Bertram Johnson, director of Multifaith Works' care team, which provides support and friendship to people with HIV/AIDS, said I-1000 provides a compassionate option for the dying, allowing their loved ones "to release them peacefully."
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